I am often asked what does a healthy relationship looks like? I would prefer to use the word securely attached than healthy; however, they mean the same thing.
Here is what secure couples do well
- They sometimes argue and fight; however, they know how to come back together and repair the fracture the fight has caused.
- They don’t always say things in the right way; however, they know how to give a good apology and are gracious about each other’s flaws.
- Sometimes hurt each other’s feelings; however, they have enough sensitivity to know what they have done to upset their partner and makes amends.
- They strive for improvement and not perfection. They are willing to praise their partners for trying to improve and to encourage them to do so.
- They are committed to each other and their relationship improvement. They know that growing together is strength building and will help sustain the relationship.
- They put each other first.
- They don’t tolerate abuse towards each other or from outside the relationship.
The most important quality in any relationship is the skills to repair after an argument. The ability to say sorry and to own your part in the rupture. To put the relationship and each other first
Relationship and Couples Counsellor